Tuesday, March 27, 2007

New King of Talossa Addresses his People

-- Tolassian News Service

The King Addresses the Nation
« Thread Started on Mar 15, 2007, 6:00am »

My Lord Duke, My Lords, Ladies, Gentlemen, fellow-citizens of the Kingdom of Talossa, my very dear friends —

It has been nineteen months since a King of Talossa last spoke to the nation. Today that long silence comes to an end. I stand before you all, the newly created King of Talossa, the fifth — and largest — monarch to ascend this glorious Throne. I am humbled and not a little amazed by the trust you have shown me, the dignity to which you have raised me; and I pledge to you that I will do all in my power to prove worthy of that trust, and to bear with honour and good humour the burden the Talossan people have laid upon me. Yours will be my best efforts of industry, honesty, ingenuity, dedication, and prayer, to ensure (insofar as this changeful world allows for surety) that the Kingdom of Talossa may grow, prosper, and flourish for many years — for many generations — after I have gone to my reward.

I imagine that, as the months and years pass, I will have quite a few things to say to you. (Steel yourselves.) On this happy day, though, I will try to be reasonably brief, at least insofar as brevity is consistent with pomposity. A few points of business, though, must needs be addressed, a few things said.

1. The Royal House

It is our royal will and pleasure that our House be styled “La Casâ és la Dünastà Lupul”, “The House and Dynasty of Lupul”, and that we ourselves be known as “King John” or “Regeu Ián”. It will be necessary, therefore, to modify the Organic and House Law on these and related points, an undertaking which we confidently entrust to the attention of the Ziu, sooner better than later. In particular, we desire that the Ziu consider the difficult question of the admission of adopted children into the royal succession, and furthermore the question of the transmission of the Crown should the royal line ever again fail (which heaven avert), both of which questions impact both Organic and Statutory law.

Our reign shall be reckoned as commencing on the fourteenth day of March in the year of salvation two thousand and seven (the eve, by what we trust to be mere happenstance, of the two thousand fiftieth anniversary of the assassination of Caius Julius Caesar), after an interregnum of one hundred and five days — a number, it would seem certain, replete with mystic significance.

2. Heraldic matters and the Coronation

We and our heirs royal shall henceforth bear “Quarterly, 1 and 4 Talossa, 2 and 3 Lupul”, or more fully “Quarterly, 1 and 4 argent the Chinese glyph Ben sable, 2 and 3 per fess azure and vert, a wolf salient argent armed and langued gules, and in sinister chief a rose argent charged with a heart gules”. Supporters: “Representing Saint Perpetua and Saint Felicity, a Roman lady hair dressed and a Berber woman hair dishevelled, both proper crined sable vested argent each bearing a palm branch vert.” Motto: “Cor Unum”.

We shall make use, as badge, of “A rose argent charged with a heart gules”.

We request and command our right-beloved Squirrel King of Arms, in consultation and collaboration with his College, 1) to advise with us concerning the addition of a crest to our achievement, but they are not to consider a bonacon even for a moment, 2) to record these devices in the Kingdom’s Armorial, 3) to take thought and counsel as to the titles, styles, and arms of our son Prince Patrick, heir presumptive to the throne – nor is it our thought that Talossa need, at this time, distinguish between “His Highness” and “His Royal Highness” –, 4) to bring the Peerage up to date with regard to our accession, 5) to remind our non-armigerous citizenry, over and over again, of the College’s ready eagerness to assist them in devising way cool Coats of Arms for themselves and their descendants, and 6) to consult and work with the officials of the Ministry for Home Affairs and other appropriate persons concerning the celebration of a vastly pompous Coronation for ourselves. For be known and understood, as a principle of our House and of the Talossan monarchy henceforth and forever, that the crowning of a Talossan monarch should nowise be celebrated in any place wheresoever except within the sacred boundaries of the Kingdom.

3. The Privy Council

Among the amendments to the Organic Law now being considered is Lord Lauriéir’s “Privy Council Act”, which (if passed) will require that the King name a Council “with whom he shall consult whenever possible on all matters of grave importance to the Kingdom, and whose duty shall be to offer the King the benefit of their individual and collective wisdom and advice. The King shall take care to include in this council those citizens with the longest and deepest connections to the ongoing historical life of the Kingdom, in particular those who are personally familiar with the homeland itself.” Struck by the wisdom of this proposal, mindful of the weakness of our unassisted judgement, and craving trustworthy advice, we now, anticipating the Organic establishment of the Privy Council, do ourselves establish it off our own stick as it were, and do therefore hereby appoint to our Privy Council the following honoured, well-beloved, and faithful citizens of the Kingdom:

First, the chief of our nobility, the first-elected Prime Minister of the Kingdom, elected Seneschál an unequalled five times (thus far!), Senator and Senior Justice of the Uppermost Cort — Duke Ián von Metáiriâ.

Secondly, the first-naturalized citizen of Talossa, three times elected Prime Minister, who served as Regent and sole Justice of the Uppermost Cort during a critical period following the abdication of our predecessor and royal cousin King Robert I — Count Danihél Lauriéir.

Thirdly, the former Prime Minister and current Justice and Lord President of the Senate, Governor of our own home province of Florenciâ, and, God willing, cultivator of many fine dandelions — Baron Quedéir Castiglhâ.

We confide that, guided by the wisdom of such eminent Talossans, and others whom we intend and desire to add to their number, the Crown is in little danger of running either astray or amok; and we call upon the entire nation to congratulate and support them in the arduous task they now face. We shall try not to make it arduouser than need be.

4. Closing remarks

Nor would we be thought unmindful, at this propitious time, of the friends of our Kingdom who are no longer, or who never were, our citizens. In particular, we extend the hand of friendship and fellowship to the people of the Talossan Republic, to whom so many historic, cultural, and personal ties bind us so inseparably. And to other long-time Talossans, no longer with us, our mind and heart go out as well — to Sir Tomás Gariçéir, Gary Cone, Sir Josh Macht and Sandy Prachel, Marguerite Converse, Marc Moisan, and the many others whose friendship the Kingdom shall always cherish, and without whom Talossa doesn’t seem quite complete.

We should be remiss, did we not express most heartfelt thanks and appreciation to the Justices of the Cort pü Înalt for their service these last months as Council of Regency; to Dr. Greg Rajala for his service as Regent to our predecessor King Louis for a year before that; to S:reu Mick Preston, who agreed to take over the Chancery when circumstances dictated that the Secretary of State should resign; and to all the Talossan people for their support, affection, goodwill, kindness, and enthusiasm. Dieu salvadra el Regipäts Talossán!

— John, by the Grace of God, King of Talossa and of all its Realms and Regions, King of Cézembre, Sovereign Lord and Protector of Pengöpäts and the New Falklands, Defender of the Faith, Leader of the Armed Forces, Viceroy of Hoxha and Vicar of Atatürk

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